Life at the Row House

There Is No Two

2011-03-02T20:37:00.000-05:00

Here's a couple of funny things we overheard today

The two three-year-olds are arguing because they'd seen a toy commercial and both of them wanted it...

Kid1: Dad, Karson wants the same thing that I want!
Me: It's OK if you both want the same thing.
K1: No! I don't want him to want it!
Me: What if we bought two of them?
K1: There is no two.
Me: Well, what if I bought seven of them?
K1: There is no seven. Sorry!

And at dinner time...

5-year-old: I don't want no mashed potatoes.
Mikesha: I don't want any mashed potatoes.
5yo: Me neither!

Kalebisms

2010-08-10T22:49:00.001-04:00

My six-year-old, Kaleb, came up to me and said, “I need you to save up $1000 for my band.”

I replied, “I think you need to save $1000 yourself.”

Kaleb came back with, “Well, can you at least help me save $1000 with your money? I need a sound system for my band.”

A little later, Kaleb said to Kyle (my 17-year-old), “Kyle, we should save our money to buy my guitar.”

Kyle said, “Kaleb, why am I saving my money?”

Kaleb said, “Ok... I guess you can use my amp.” (He doesn't have an amp, but I wonder if he's thinking about that sound system.)

The other day, Kyle said something about needing a personal trainer to help him get in shape. Kaleb said, “OK, fine, I'll do it.”

Kaleb climbed up on a box and said, “We're going to start with some push-ups — get down and give me 20.”

Kyle did a couple but then said he was done. Kaleb said, “Good, ‘cause I'm done too.”

Row Recipes: Chocolate Cobbler

2010-05-16T00:40:00.002-04:00

Chocolate Cobbler,
originally uploaded by
ginnerobot.

a.k.a. Hot Fudge Cake
a.k.a. Chocolate Pudding Cake
a.k.a. Devil's Float

I first heard about Chocolate Cobbler this past Wednesday on the Pioneer Woman's site.

All the ingredients were things we keep on hand; so I made a mental note to try it sometime.

Thursday, my Comcast internet connection wasn't very comcastic, and I found myself with extra time on my hands -- enough time to try out the recipe.

Mikesha said it was "ridiculous" -- meaning ridiculously tasty.

The dessert was so good that we decided we should make a larger version on Friday for our family night. And so we did.

And then tonight, after we spent most of the day painting our family room, we decided we needed a little something to reward ourselves for our hard work, and so we made another one.

One dessert, made three days in a row. Ridiculous!

By the way, we made the regular 8x8 version the first time. That's much too small when you have 10 people in the house.

The following is our 9x13 version:

Chocolate Cobbler

Ingredients
2 cups self-rising flour (or 2 cups all-purpose flour + 4 tsp baking powder + ½ tsp salt)
7/8 cup coca powder, divided (into 6 Tbsp and ½ cup)
2½ cup sugar, divided (into 1½ cup and 1 cup).
1 cup milk
2/3 cup melted butter
1 Tbsp vanilla extract
1 cup light brown sugar, packed
3 cups hot tap water

Directions
Preheat oven to 350°

Stir together the flour, 6 Tbsp cocoa, and 1½ cup sugar.

Stir in the milk, melted butter, and vanilla extract and mix until smooth.

Spread the batter into a 9x13 baking dish.

In a separate bowl, mix 1 cup sugar, 1 cup light brown sugar, and ½ cup cocoa.

Sprinkle the sugar and cocoa mixture evenly over the batter.

Pour the hot tap water over everything. DO NOT STIR! (Yes, this looks weird; weird enough to call in the kids and show them just how weird it looks and say, “Can you believe this is going to turn into something good?”)

Bake for 40 minutes or until the center is set. (This took 40 minutes Friday, but 45 minutes Saturday -- maybe the weather was different?)

Don't bother trying to stick in a knife to see if it comes out clean -- it won't -- there's way too much gooey goodness inside. Just look (or even prod with a finger) to see if the top of the cobbler in the center is firm. You should notice that some chunks of cobbler will be a little higher than the surroundings. These will be little ‘islands’, similar to cake-like brownies, which should spring back when prodded.

You won't know this yet, but those ‘islands’ are floating on a sea of chocolate sauce that somehow formed all over the bottom of the pan. This is magical stuff!

To serve, allow to cool a little (or not -- it's that good!), then plate up a good-sized spoonful (or two) of cobbler, ladle the chocolate sauce from the pan bottom over the cobbler, and add a scoop (or two) of vanilla ice-cream on the side.

Be careful! It's addicting!

What?

2009-11-18T22:26:00.001-05:00

Kaleb was reviewing his list of "sight words" -- words that don't necessarily conform to phonic rules and, so, have to be learned through memorization.

He asked, "What does 'h-e-r-e' spell?" I replied, "here."

He asked, "What does 'w-h-a-t' spell?" I replied, "What?"
He asked again, "What does 'w-h-a-t' spell?" I replied, "What?"
He asked a third time...

I could have kept it going a lot longer, but Keaton spoiled my fun. "Kaleb, w-h-a-t spells what!"

Lion's Choice

2009-11-18T20:04:00.000-05:00

Whenever we travel (even if it's to Indianapolis), we rarely eat at a Wendy's or Burger King or any other restaurant that we have in our home town.

In Indianapolis or Kokomo, we'll often drive through Rally's, as Lafayette, for who-knows-what-reason, does not have one.

In St. Louis, our fast-food stop of choice is Lion's Choice.

We first met Lion's Choice when we broke for lunch during the 2008 Teen Talent Expo in St Louis, and we fell in love with it for three reasons:

The roast beef - still served a little red, like most Prime Rib is served.
The horseradish sauce - with plenty of punch to it -- not at all like the watered-down, made-for-the-masses horsey sauce found at another roast beef chain.
The 15¢ ice cream cones - or 25¢ for a chocolate-dipped cone.

We liked Lion's Choice so much that we timed this summer's trip to convention so that we could stop at Lion's Choice on the way. And then, on the way back, we ate there again.

This past Sunday, I (KC) had to go to Joplin for some business. Guess where I stopped for lunch... the Lion's Choice in Eureka.

Shortly after I ate, I got a call from my Father-in-law, who was driving to Branson. He said he had just finished lunch in Sullivan, MO... at a Lion's Choice.

Yesterday, I walked in the family room carrying my Lion's Choice soft-drink cup that I hadn't thrown away yet. Keaton saw it and exclaimed, "You ate at Lion's Choice? No fair! You always eat at the good places!"

I then showed Keaton my Jack-in-the-box cup, but that's another story.

Keaton did ask, however, if we might be able to go to Missouri for lunch!

Visiting with Grandma Row

2009-10-05T01:58:00.000-04:00

Grandma asked me, "What happened to your hair?" Used to be that Grandma talked about how thick my hair was. Times are changing!

Later, I met Grandma's dining buddies Ruth, Pearl and Virginia.

Ruth is Grandma's roommate. Grandma said the staff put them together because they thought they'd known each other before, but Grandma told me she'd never met the lady.

Ruth didn't talk much, but Pearl... she's quite the talker.

At one point, Kaleb, my youngest, was standing near Pearl and she cried out, "Oh my God! You're just a doll!"

Pearl kept trying to get Kaleb to talk, but Kaleb's a little shy at times. Pearl would ask, "Can you say 'hi'? Can you say, 'I love you'?", but she'd get nothing out of Kaleb. After a little bit of this, Kaleb finally responded, and Virginia piped up, "Why he can talk!"

Grandma introduced all of us, and she did so as only a Grandma could:

"This tall one's Kyle; he's the singer. This next one's Hannah; she's the photographer. Then here's Korben; he's the reader. This one's Keaton; he's the musician. And this little one's Kaleb, and we don't know what he's going to be yet."

All through the introductions, Pearl listened, nodded and commented. Grandma then mentioned that we lived in Lafayette. "I've got friends in Lafayette!," said Pearl.

Grandma went on to say that I worked for Crane, and Pearl looked right at me and said, "It's nice to meet you, Russell."

Grandma tried to explain that my name was Ken, at which point Pearl looked directly at my son Kyle and said, "And it's nice to meet you, Ken."

Grandma just shook her head and gave up trying straighten Pearl out.

Here's a rarity... a picture of Grandma! I managed to snap this using Hannah's phone. If I'd walked in with a camera, Grandma would've fussed, but she didn't pay attention at all to the phone.

Grandma and Kaleb

Grandpa's Cold Coffee

2009-10-04T22:30:00.001-04:00

[Note: The family and I drove to Bedford today to see my Grandpa Row who is currently in Dunn's ICU due to possible mini-strokes]

When I arrived, Grandpa was nearing the end of his dessert. He'd wanted Neopolitan ice cream, but they only had orange sherbet, so Grandpa settled for that. Slowly and carefully, he finished off the last of it, then asked for some coffee.

My sister Kelly said he had coffee on his tray, but she thought it might be cold.

"Well, coffee's coffee," grandpa replied.

Kelly offered him the straw. He sipped and then grumbled, "The least they could have done was warm it up!"

That sounds like the Grandpa I remember!

I'm hopeful that Grandpa's on the mend. My cousin Beth reported that he'd asked her to bring him back a Twinkie. He's also sleeping peacefully, which is significant because he fights sleep if he thinks he's ill -- He doesn't want to die in his sleep.

The Harlot Channel?

2009-07-18T02:25:00.000-04:00

"Dad, the TV's not working!," exclaimed Kaleb, our 5-year-old, two days ago.

I came into the den, glanced at the TV, and observed it was displaying blocks of messed-up TV picture across the screen and muting the audio.

I explained to Kaleb that the TV signal was pixelizing -- displaying little blocks of messed-up TV instead of a good picture. He said, "Oh!", and I changed to a different channel with better reception.

Yesterday, same problem. I said, "It's pixelizing again," and changed the TV to a better channel.

Today, we were watching TV together. It started acting up, and Kaleb said, "Dad, it's prostituting."

I should have simply said, "You mean pixelizing," but I didn't think enough before speaking. I added on, "Prostituting is something entirely different."

Of course that opened the way for Kaleb's next question.... "What's prostituting?"

"Uh... that's a word you don't need to know about until you're older."

He seemed satisfied enough with that answer... Whew!

What To Do If a Pot Catches Fire, Per Kaleb

2009-05-06T10:35:00.000-04:00

While I cooked oatmeal this morning, Kaleb asked me what I would do if a pot caught on fire.

I said that I might carry it outside and let it burn itself out, or I might just put a lid on it.

Kaleb said, "Or, you could roast marshmallows!"

I can see it now.... Kaleb, as an adult faced with a grease fire, heading out to the yard to cut himself a roasting stick!

I wonder what he would have done if he'd been Moses at the burning bush -- "Wow, a burning bush! Anybody got marshmallows?"

Duck Daddy! They've got ....

2009-04-29T08:49:00.000-04:00

This one goes way back, but I still laugh about it today.

Hannah was just a few years old. (She's sixteen now).

I was driving, and I noticed a car behind us. To make things fun, I decided to pretend we were being chased by bad guys. I said, "Duck, Hannah! They've got guns!" We both hunched down. Hannah laughed. I smiled.

A little later, Hannah cries out, "Duck, Daddy! They've got knives!"

I laughed a little and then asked, "What are they going to do with knives?" Hannah paused, then said "Oh! They've got guns!"

You are the best - How old are you?

2009-04-27T11:42:00.000-04:00

With so many kids, we can't tell just one of them that they're the best boy or girl in the world, so we qualify the statement by adding their age.

Last night at bedtime, I told Kaleb, "You are the best five-year-old in the world."

Kaleb replied, "You are the best - how old are you?"

"41."

"You're the best 41-year-old daddy in the world."

I reckon I should serve notice on all the other 41-year-old daddies out there -- My five-year-old says I'm the best!

The hard way or the easy way...

2009-04-22T13:09:00.000-04:00

One of KC's favorite sayings to the kids is, "We can do this the hard way or the easy way." Hard way meaning the right hand of fellowship applied to the seat of knowledge or the easy way they can just do it without any assistance. It is usually preceeded by one of the kids not wanting to put their shoes on or not wanting to sit in that particular seat in the van. You know what I mean, those everyday little battles that seem so important to them at the time.

One day his words came back to haunt him. Kaleb and I were getting ready so we could all go to lunch and KC was the last one ready as usual. After numerous times of running up and down the stairs to daddy's office to see if he was ready to go he finally said, "Now, Daddy, we can do this the hard way or the easy way.!"

Lord, Open My Eyes So I Can See

2009-04-15T22:10:00.000-04:00

I'm not sure how many times as a pastor I prayed that simple prayer and received amazing answers.

Looking for a paper form, I prayed it. God said to check the kitchen cabinets. I didn't, at least right away. It just didn't make sense to me that the form would be in a kitchen cabinet. But, the form was in the cabinet.

Looking for shoes, I prayed it. God said, "Sit Down." I sat -- and I immediately saw my shoes in the top of a laundry basket underneath a table.

I haven't had as much luck with that prayer these past four years.

I suspect that God used to answer it so often because He knew I would tell my congregation all about it. And I did -- every time! This past four years, though, no congregation -- no opening-of-the-eyes-so-I-can-see.

Until today.

I was supposed to bring a DVD to church, but I forgot to grab it. I hurried back to the house, but couldn't find the DVD.

I looked on the dresser where I last saw it.
I looked on my desk.
I looked on Mikesha's desk.
I looked on the kitchen counter.
I looked on the kitchen table.
I looked on the dining room table.
I looked on my bathroom counter.
I looked on the coffee table.
I looked on my bed and all of my kids' beds.
I looked in all of the various DVD players in my house.
I looked in the vehicle I was driving.

I called my wife, and she quizzed the kids. Keaton mentioned hiding the movie behind the curtain in the family room. I checked, and there was indeed a movie there, but it was #2 in the series -- I needed #1.

Just as I was about to give up, I got the idea to pray, "Lord, open my eyes so I can see where the movie is". I then thought about how God used to answer that prayer when I pastored, and then... I saw the corner of the DVD case peeking out from under a small stack of papers on Mikesha's desk.

God did it! A four-year run of unanswered open-my-eyes prayers has ended.

I wonder if this means pastoring is in my near future.

Or, maybe God just knew I would write about it.

Uncle Roddie's Buddy

2009-04-14T22:32:00.000-04:00

Our youngest son has an unusually strong bond with our Pastor from Bedford. Our kids call them Uncle Rodney and Aunt Angie, to say that they are important to our family is an understatement. We received word Sunday night that Rodney's father had passed away.

We were sitting at the dinner table Monday evening, and were discussing who in the family likes hot sauce. To which I told the kids Uncle Erik (KC's little brother) likes hot sauce on everything. Kaleb announced without hesitation that "Uncle Roddie is my favorite...I miss Uncle Roddie." I made the announcement that we needed to pray for Uncle Rodney this week because his daddy had passed away. Kaleb immediately started crying and climbed up in my lap.

Later that evening, I was talking to Aunt Angie on the phone and Kaleb wanted to talk to her. So he did, then she passed the phone to Uncle Roddie...here's how the conversation went:

Uncle Roddie: Hey buddy how are you?
Kaleb: I am fine. I am sorry your daddy passed away...(with tears in his eyes)
Uncle Roddie: Thanks buddy, you take care and be good.

Need less to say...I was in tears. I was floored by the compassion Kaleb at 5 yrs old felt for his Uncle Roddie.

Flushing the Outhouse

2009-04-12T21:21:00.000-04:00

We were out Sunday driving today when Hayden said she needed to the use the restroom. We were miles from any restaurants or gas stations, but there was a state park just a mile away -- so that's where we went.

I drove past two shelter houses whose restrooms were too far from the parking area until I found what appeared to be a stand-alone outhouse fairly close to the road.

I checked it out. It didn't look bad, so I wiped down the seat and sent Hayden inside.

Her first question: Where's the sink?

I explained it was just an outhouse, that there wasn't a sink.

She looked around, looked through the toilet into the tank, and then decided it was safe enough. I stepped outside while she went about her business.

After she finished and started back to the car, I asked if she flushed.

The expression on her face read, "Oh my, I think I forgot!" She turned to go back, but then remembered.

I laughed, and she said, "Dad!"

That wasn't the first "Dad!" I've gotten from her. I doubt it'll be the last one either.

Hayden Says "He can wait..."

2009-04-08T20:33:00.000-04:00

Earlier this evening, Hannah and Hayden had a nice sisterly chat. Hannah 16 and Hayden 7 share a bedroom and were just hanging out for a bit. They were discussing their future weddings and all that entails...dresses and colors and flowers etc. They talked about honeymoons and where they might go...Hannah wants to go to Ireland or Costa Rica and Hayden said Ireland too but would have to talk to her future fiance.

Hayden was explaining the age old custom of carrying the bride over the threshold and she proceeded to talk about the honeymoon night. At that point, she tells her sister "He can just wait for a couple of nights and sleep on the couch so I can get used to the idea of sleeping with someone...." Needless to say, this brought much laughter to her older and wiser sister and her parents. Kids are so funny!!

Thank God for Daddy

2009-04-05T02:36:00.000-04:00

The other day, I was standing at our stove dishing up supper for our kids. Several of them had lined up -- Keaton (9 years old) and Korben (10 years old) were jostling for the front position. Josh (9 years old, but looks like he's 12) was right behind them. Kaleb (5 years old) was behind the others, but trying to get up front.

I filled the first plate, and handed it to... Kaleb.

Korben, Keaton, and Josh all protested, "but I was here first!"

I explained that it is always the job of the older kids to take care of the younger kids.

I then proceeded to dish out food to Hayden (7 years old), Josh, Keaton, and Korben.

As I did so, I asked if they noticed that I hadn't given any food to myself yet. I told them the reason was because it's always the job of the older ones to take care of the younger ones.

When we all got to the table, Josh offered to pray.

His prayer, "Thank you, Jesus, for this food, and thank you for Daddy."

By the way, Josh is a foster son we'd only had for a week or two. I was surprised that he started calling me "Dad". I was touched that he thanked God for me.

Penny Pizza

2009-03-11T11:22:00.000-04:00

Yesterday afternoon, my five-year-old son, Kaleb, came up and asked if I had a penny.

"Yes, I think I do. Why do you want one?"

"We can go to Pizza Hut and buy a pizza for a penny."

"I think you have to buy a pizza at the regular price first, then we can get the next one for a penny."

"Well, we could call Dedad [grandpa] and have him buy the first one, then we could buy another one for a penny."

Toasted Cheese

2009-03-11T11:15:00.000-04:00

This morning, amongst the general commotion involved with prepping lunch bags for school, Keaton and Josh tell me there's something wrong with the toaster.

I look and see two thin columns of smoke wafting out of the top of it.

I take a closer look and see cheese slices down inside the toaster slots!